Everyone needs compassion
And love that never fails
Let mercy fall on me
When everyone needs forgiveness
Kindness of the Saviour
The Hope of the nation
Saviour, He can move the mountains
My God is mighty to save
He is mighty to save
Forever author of salvation
He rose and conquered the grave
Jesus conquered the grave
So take me as you find me
All my fears and failures
Fill my life again
I give my life to follow
Everything that i believe in
Now i surrender
Shine a light in and
let the whole world see
Singing, for the glory of the risen king
Jesus, Shine a light and
let the whole world see
Singing for the glory of the risen king
His child
Jerome Lee - eversianz
AHS 1F'08,2k'09,3H'10,4H'11
SHPS 1/6,2/6,3/9,4/9,5/9,6/9
BB 49J(2004-2007) 14th(2008-2011)
Leading Boy(Pri Sch), Warrant Officer(Sec Sch)
Once a Hildan, always a hildan.
GOD is my saviour.He is always there for me.
Still ever feeling lonely.
Wants.
New Games
New Bball
New Phone
New Pencil Case DONE
New Watch DONE
New Clothes
Crumpler Slingbag...
Know More People.
Learn More Stuff.
Learn Drums
Learn Dancing
Learn Japanese
Go into top 5 Jcs.
Go into University.
her...
Saturday, May 14, 2011
-5/14/2011 10:31:00 PM
I have decided to start blogging again. I need to vent my emotions and stuff. HOPEFULLY SOMEONE OUT THERE READING WILL HELP ME AND NOT MAKE LIFE WORSE THAN IT IS>.<
somehow through this secondary 4 year, I dun feel motivated to do anything. The main priority is still studying but... I dun see myself working towards any goal. I dun think I am even worth anything now. All that I have worked for seems useless. It all seems retarded.
Will anyone treasure me? Will anyone even notice if i disappear from the face of this earth?
The depression kind of stuff is all coming back.
It is as though... SO WHAT IF I GO TO TOP 5 JCs? SO WHAT IF I GO TO UNIVERSITY?
what would happen? I get an unstable job and unable to survive on this earth? It may be true. But whatsover.. it is how u perspect life. If you are happy, WHY NOT?
BUT i cannot find that happiness. those goals. those dreams. and my future.
NOTHING AT ALL IS IN MY LIFE.
My friends. My family. EVERYONE. Is not there already.
ALL I have is God.
But I always keep clinging to the relationships with the rest, the humans on earth. Hoping that something would change between me and all of them. BUT nothing.
I guess I really have to go to God if I hope have anything in my life.
HUMAN nature. The selfish instinct. It really kills all relationship with me and others. I MEAN LIKE, SO YOU DONT TREAT ME AS YOUR FRIEND? OR YOU JUST DUNNO HOW TO HAVE FRIENDS? it is as though you cant sacrifice a little for your friend. for that simple request, and dont trust your friend no more?
What is the world coming to? Selfish people? I really have no strength to face the world. Not even staying in my house. Irrational thinking. NO sense of consideration. ONLY in the name of STUDYING. then there will be consideration. OH WOW. why I am not surprised? I just wanna go learn something that i am really passionate about and do it for life. I am not going to do some stupid corporate business or be in some dam fking office job. I feel it isnt the place for me. Like those ADHD kind of ppl. Cannot sit still one.
AIYA screw this. I wonder if anyone would still read this. I DUN really care about my life anymore. Maybe I should consult a counsellor. I really have issues and even suicidal thoughts. But it i as though I still wanna keep my 'face'. I have a reputation in my school, within my friends. Be it good or bad, It is still a reputation. I dunno why I just feel like being another person and just do something crazy. BO BALLS? nope. I just think very rationally and do things like a good boy. DUN really go against the rule. As though everyone is watching my every move and grading me, I tend to keep my face in good conditions. However, when i was a kid, I would cry in public like nobody's business. I really dun want to care. But the reputation and how ppl think of you is like the MOST important thing in our lives.
Dun wanna talk too much. Need to study alr. FOR THE SAKE. OF FK. I DUNNO =.= idiotically i dun wanna do anything. WOULD ANYONE BE THERE FOR ME? WOULD YOU TALK TO ME? IF ANY FKERS OUT THERE WANNA GL ME. FK OFF.
